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Move your mind, Move your body, Move your soul.

Shift.

From Me to We

11/18/2020

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Today might be a bit of a ramble.

It's so funny how healing is. I can tell you what it isn't. It isn't a one-time thing. It isn't getting somewhere and everything is a jolly ole pile of rainbows one day. It comes and goes. Much like water,  and maybe this is why the ocean seems to know me.

I took today off of work. I was feeling this pent up "doneness" brimming. Quick to annoyance. Quick to tears. Realizing I am feeling a little off. That's the sub-title of this year, isn't it?

So I took the day - and I'm not calling it 'self-care', because I feel really adverse to that language (not sure why yet). I don't know what I'm calling it. But it's a day to re-set my nervous system. It's a focused healing, here-and-now day. It's a remembering who I am day. I'm saying YES to what I want and No, Thanks to those things I don't. Of course, I'm still a Mama, surrounded by teens who are surfacing their own emotions. I still have bills to pay and a list of "things" to do. I suppose it's expanding the time + space to breathe into my heart and to listen to what I need. And then doing those things.

A couple of realizations today:
  • I am a safe space. When I drop the judgments of myself and others, I can be what I am meant to be. Love and support. I love when I catch myself embodying this for my kids. Allow, allow, allow. And then soothe.
  • For a long time, I wanted people to like me. So much that I focused on HOW I could get people to like me rather than getting to know and liking other people. These days, I am investing energy in myself and in the people that I want to know more about. This is a HUGE shift for me. It also makes it easier to lean into the connections that my heart wants to grow.
  • No one else needs to tell me that my story/my experience/my gift(s) matters. I can provide the validation I need for myself. This completely links to the realization above.

I am so excited to continue this day. It is like a deep breath for my whole being.
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    You gotta feel it to heal it.

    ​Our physical bodies are the primary tool we use to experience this life. Connecting with our breath, moving vibrations through our physical bodies, feeling what comes up, and then releasing through expression, surrender, creativity. This is being human in these human bodies.

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